The Ins and Outs of
Potty Training
Potty Training
By Samantha Jackson
Background
At some point in our lives, usually between two to four years
old, we all learn to control our bladder and bowel functions. I was almost two
when I could officially say “I’m a big kid now”. As I cannot remember those times, I looked to
the one person who would know best; my mother. I was a very easy child to
teach. M&M’s were my reward for when I did the good deed. Potty training
for me began when I saw the other kids at day care using the “big potty” and I figured
out how to remove my diaper. Most of the time, I would wait until we were in a
public place, such as the beach, and my mother would have to chase my
bare-naked booty across the sand in order to get a new one on.
One of her favorite
stories to tell to my friends is the time that I “had an accident” in the
bathtub. She was in my room preparing my night clothes when she heard me start
to cry and call for her. Upon entering
the bathroom, she noticed I was frantically trying to climb up the back side of
the tub. In the tub was a single floating brown mass. I was terrified of it
because it was moving closer. My mother did what any good mother would do and
laughed a lot before finally rescuing me.
She was a single mother, who raised me on her own until I was
six. My step-father then stepped into the picture and when I was seventeen
years old, we were all blessed with the miracle that is my little brother,
Gabriel. He will be three in November and we are all taking turns with the
potty training.
Why am I writing?
Raising a
child is new to me. I do not have children of my own, nor have I ever spent a
considerable amount of time around children to say that I had a part in raising
them. This is my first experience. It is full of surprises and frustrations,
especially potty training. I cannot figure out the proper method or technique
that other parents and older siblings use. My parents are about as lost as I
am. My father hasn’t potty trained a child in roughly thirty years and for my
mother is has been a little over nineteen years. I want to find research that
will assist me in this process and make the learning experience run smoothly.
My initial questions are as follows:
• Are boys more difficult than girls to
potty train?
• Is it better to use underwear or
pull-ups?
• What reward systems should I set up
for every time he uses the toilet?
• Are potty chairs better to use or
should we adjust him to the actual toilet?
I feel that
if I can answer these questions that I will be able to successfully teach my
brother how to regularly use the toilet, or a potty chair, instead of diapers.
We are already partially on the road to achieving this goal. Gabriel recognizes
the need to go and tells us so, yet he still messes in his diapers. Much to my
distaste.
What I already know
• Are boys more difficult than girls to
potty train?
Most of my friends and
family that have kids past the potty-training age have said that girls are
harder to potty train. I have no experience with female toddlers, so I cannot
confirm if this is true. However, I do know that teaching a little boy to pee
standing up is a lot harder when you are in fact not equipped with the same
tools.
• Is it better to use underwear or
pull-ups?
Pull-ups are absorbent
like a diaper, but they slide on like underwear. The downfall with pull-ups is
that the child will still feel like they are wearing a diaper and won’t always
pull them down to sit on the toilet. On the other hand, if I was to use
strictly underwear, I’d have to be washing them constantly and keep the mop on
hand at all times. I have already tried this method several times and Gabriel
seems to forget or ignore that he has to pull them down to go potty. When I
leave him naked from the waist down, he does fantastic because there is nothing
there so he knows he must sit down. In that aspect, I have succeeded but this
new process will be the most difficult hurdle to overcome.
• What reward systems should I set up
for every time he uses the toilet?
I can’t use Cheerios as
we use those for “target practice” in the toilet. I don’t think it would go
over well if I then provided him with the same thing he just peed on. I have tried cookies but then he got used to
just sitting on his chair and pretending to go and expecting a cookie. High
fives and praise works well but “the experts” and “veterans” say that a
physical reward, mostly edible, is the best to use.
• Are potty chairs better to use or
should we adjust him to the actual toilet?
I do not know much about
this. We have a potty chair and we have a toilet seat adjusted to fit his small
tush. He prefers the potty chair since we keep it in the living room for quick
access. The toilet seat we save for upstairs, when he is playing in his room or
in the tub. He does not like being helped climbing on the toilet, most often
than not so most accidents occur when he is attempting to get onto the toilet
to relieve himself.
The Search
I suppose I
am not entirely clear on how to write this section. I looked at some of the
examples provided online and I was curious if I could set it up like the
pervious section but how I found the answers? I’m not sure if it’s okay to
mimic the section before or not. Also, if I understood correctly, the “search”
that I gave would actually be more like my answer or should I change that around too? I have a feeling I mixed both in together so I have to find a way to seperate it. For now, it's under 'The Answer' section.
The Answer
Potty
training was an interesting topic to decide upon when thinking about my
Isearch. I originally wanted to do something about Necrotizing Fasciitis,
Breeding Gargoyle Geckos, and something about trying to determine if my Bearded
Dragon was sick and how I could cure her. None of these choices panned out so I
was left with the only thing that I was currently doing. Potty training
Gabriel.
The Internet has a plethora of sources for
this. The problem is finding sources that are credible and have useful
information. I know I could theoretically use anything but I wanted to use
something that had sources and didn't look like it had been written by someone
who had never ever been around a child.
The first article online that I found
seemed credible enough but the information was very vague and didn't exactly
answer my question. I kept the link just in case I could use it later on but as
of right now, it isn't something I find important. The next few articles were
of no help at all as they only talked about potty training girls. If Gabriel
had been Gabrielle, that would be nice information but the parts are a bit
different.
My neighbor has a son that is a year
younger than Gabriel and he also picked up an interest in potty training. I
asked her a bit about what she did but she couldn't give me concrete answers
because he would only go on the toilet at the baby-sitter's house. When he was
home and they tried to potty train him, he would decide to use the floor or the
laundry basket instead of the toilet. While this information was interesting
and could potentially be looked into for answers, it didn't relate to my
brother. Gabriel doesn't go to a baby sitter nor is he trying to relieve
himself on anything but the toilet or in his pull-ups. Even interviewing my mom
gave little help as apparently I potty trained myself at the baby sitter's
also.
The biggest piece of information came from
Gabe's new doctor. She told us that typically boys do not start potty training
until 3 and a half years old. Gabe did just turn three and it's great that he
shows an interest but he may just not be ready. She told us that we should stop
with the potty training and let him take the reins. If he says he wants to use
the toilet, then we can let him but we shouldn't be placing him on it every
half hour or continuously asking him if he has to go. It could turn him off of
wanting to transition and put a setback in his development.
I still want to get a hold of some books to
possibly get some more information on the psychology behind potty training but
as of right now, the quest of potty training Gabriel is on a hold.
